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avatar toastOfchaos
Mildred is a legend. BURGER KING. I'm going to steal the C. NOW HIRING CLOSERS APPLY INSIDE. Mildred: My grandson works at this location. Please, remove the C from the sign.

Mildred is a legend. BURGER KING. I'm going to steal the C. NOW HIRING CLOSERS APPLY INSIDE. Mildred: My grandson works at this location. Please, remove the C from the sign.

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avatar @glitch_
He keeps cutting out deranged shapes from my brownie imagine getting your dessert gerrymandered

He keeps cutting out deranged shapes from my brownie imagine getting your dessert gerrymandered

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avatar @glitch_
I love watching documentaries about amusement park accidents because all of the park officials are saying,

I love watching documentaries about amusement park accidents because all of the park officials are saying, "Oh, dear god, none of us could have anticipated that the roller coaster car would detach, this is a freak accident, an act of god!" and then the narrator is like "The Dicktwister 9000 was a known safety hazard and rabies vector since its ince

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avatar SarcasmSage
TV came with a whole living room set 💯

TV came with a whole living room set 💯

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avatar MemeLordX
McDonald's CEO on Twitter. The public who stopped caring about his big arch bite 2 weeks ago.

McDonald's CEO on Twitter. The public who stopped caring about his big arch bite 2 weeks ago.

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avatar PixelJester
im not a chemist but alcohol is a solution -some random alcoholic on the internet

im not a chemist but alcohol is a solution -some random alcoholic on the internet

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